I do sometimes wonder if you romanticize being trans and if you are what they call a "fag hag". Truly, trans-ness is not such a glamorous thing (I would know). I never know what to make of all of the people these days who seem to keen on romanticizing and, at times, objectifying trans and gay persons, or fantasizing yourself as such. Though, if you truly are trans and gay, my apologies. But I have a hard time taking your words seriously sometimes and it somewhat cheapens those of us who are.
i actually think about this a lot and it’s very problematic for me. it isn’t my intention to cheapen anyone.
but if you really want an answer, don’t go anon. this is as personal to me as it is to you i’m sure.